Could Beads Improve Your Marriage Intimacy?

Warning: If you are not married,  don’t read this as it addresses a topic for married folk only. Seriously, I’m not saying this to tempt you. Browse the rest of the site as you wish, but single men/women and especially young eyes, this post is not for you.

There’s always some book out there that’s all the rage in women’s circles. Usually, the books are self-help or all about improving something in our lives. What’s the current craze book all about? Sex. The book – Forty Beads: The Simple Sexy Secret to Transforming Your Marriage.

This is more than a book. It’s a method. A sisterhood. They even have workshops and parties.

If the author’s statistics are true and 15-20% of US married couples have sex less than 10 times per year, we need all the help we can get to bring sex back into marriage.

So how does it work? From what I can gather from the website, the husband has 40 beads and the wife has a bowl by the bed. When the husband desires sex, he places a bead into the bowl. At that point, the wife has 24 hours to prepare for or pursue sex.

Without having read the book, I can see some positive aspects to this approach for those struggling with sexual intimacy. The husband feels free to express his desire for sex. The wife does not feel the pressure to have sex the moment her husband initiates.

I know sex is always an important and often difficult aspect of a marriage. It has definitely been a good thermometer of Casey and I’s emotional connection. However, I don’t believe 40 beads alone could ever transform your marriage.

You can bet I’m going to add the book to my reading list though. I’ll check back in after that. Anyone out there read it and have a success story?

About Shana Bresnahan Interactive media evangelist at Vanderbilt University Medical Center that truly loves life, loves God and loves others. Wife to Casey. Owner of Minny. Aunt to 11. Advocate of transparency. (Opinions my own)
This entry was posted in Culture, Marriage, Sex. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Could Beads Improve Your Marriage Intimacy?

  1. carolyn says:

    Hi Shana,

    Carolyn Evans here, author of Forty Beads! Just ran across your post. Thanks so much for sharing the book/method on your blog! I’ve been so thrilled that the book is resonating with women and that this method that I developed totally by accident is having such a positive impact on marriages across the country. I’d love to answer any questions you might have about the Forty Beads Method and thanks again for spreading the word! Yrs, ::Carolyn

    • Carolyn – I appreciate you taking a minute to stop by and letting me know you saw my post. I haven’t read your book yet, but it’s on my list. I’ll definitely be posting about it again after reading it. Physical intimacy in marriage is one of the greatest gifts God had given us and is so important in a marriage. Often it’s the lack of emotional intimacy that has resulted in the sexless marriage, and I’m not sure any number of beads can repair that disconnection. However, I’m glad that physical intimacy is being restored in marriages thanks to your book and am sure that it’s just the right medicine for many couples. Thanks for bringing such an important and taboo topic to the surface, and working to repair physical disconnection. *Shana*

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